Is It A Crime To Be Female? By Abimbola Abatta

When I was in the university, I was ‘fortunate’ to have evaded the prying eyes of married men whose sense of morality is lost and sold to the devil.

Even as a young graduate, the experience of being ‘asked out’ by married men seemed farfetched to me. I would always lambast men whose greed and lust for women, especially young ladies, cannot be quenched.

My eyes have seen and heard horrible tales of men whose third legs navigate every corner without remorse or shame.

What beggars comprehension is how overprotective of their daughters these monsters in men’s clothing are. Once they have cool cash and cars, and you go to them for a favour, they assume the role of a lord.

‘Every favour must be repaid’ is their mantra. I ask myself, where did we go wrong? Is it a crime to be a lady? Can’t we go about our business, pursuing our purpose in life without fear of being gripped by the unabashed advances from so-called big men?

Then in school, many female students were terrorised by inhumane male lecturers whose eyes must see and undress ladies. We all heard of sex for mark in our schools today. It’s quite an eyesore.

These men will stop at nothing to mess up with lives while their daughters are shielded as a mother hen would protect its chicks.

I remember the story of a professor who after sleeping with a hundred level student, paid her to abort the pregnancy. Unfortunately, somehow, the foetus was discovered in the hostel’s dump area. The news was all over the school then. If my memory serves me well, I think the professor was sent away then.

How about another lecturer who was allegedly suspended as a result of women-matters. From a lecturer, he became a commissioner of female students’ affairs on campus.

I remember one of my lecturers then who would say, “There is nothing bad in admiring a lady. A lecturer can even ask a student out, but if she is not interested, move on.”

Well, I don’t think it is right for a married male lecturer to woo a female student. If the lecturer were to be single, that would have been a different matter. One area where I agree with that lecturer’s view is the aspect of interest.

Married men should learn to respect a lady’s No. On this matter, her no means no. Accept it, and get the hell out of her back. Stop chasing her like a wall gecko pursues flies. Respect her wishes.

Also, married men should learn to respect their wives. Is that too much to ask for? Once you are married, remain married. Stop hopping from one lady to another like a frog while you are married.

How I wish there would be a portion of the law that addresses the issue of privacy and respect. Any man who disrespects a lady should be punished. Sincerely, the struggle is real.

Many men are pure predators. They see women as objects of sexual gratification. Although some ladies enjoy the attention, and they even encourage it. But I know that many ladies loathe being treated as such.

So, I ask again, is it a crime to be a lady? As a lady, getting job opportunities, favours, help, promotion, admission, good grades, etc. pose a great dilemma when a man is in the position to make these things possible.

Every SHE matters. We all matter. We are not to be treated like filth. We are also men in women’s clothing. Our feminity is not a yes to your advances. There is no crime in admiring our beauty; there is beauty in our feminity. However, anything that exceeds platonic love is out of it.

I stand with men who are married and upright. They still exist, and their sense of morality is not dead. Our world would be a better place if we help one another out of pure love for humanity. Don’t extend a hand of help because of what you stand to gain. It is wrong joor. If your mantra is trade-by-barter favour, keep that help to yourself.

By the way, fellow females, how have you been able to turn down these irritating advances without being rude?

©Abimbola Abatta

Email: abimbola.abatta@gmail.com